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101 Funny Jokes for Kids

Natalie Vereen-davis
April 5, 2018

Got a little class clown on your hands? Here are 101 funny jokes for kids of all ages.

One of the best parts of parenthood is getting to watch your child develop their own sense of humor. You get to see them work through the logic of different punchlines and discover what kinds of humor they gravitate to the most. And there's nothing better than seeing how happy they get when they make someone laugh with a funny joke.

The only problem is that your child's joke repertoire is going to be...a little limited -- which means that you're going to hear most of them over and over again. (Orange you glad, reaaaaaally, really glad, she didn't say banana?)

To help you maintain your sanity, we took a look at joke sites like jokes4kids.com and put together a list of 101 funny kid jokes -- and ones that'll get the whole family laughing, too. So, whether your little one is pretty punny, loves knocking back knock-knock jokes, or appreciates easy riddles, we've got funny jokes for every mini comedian and comedienne.

Remember, practice makes perfect: Have your kiddos try their tricks on siblings, grandparents, your babysitter, your nanny, or even the dog to get more confident!


Funny Knock-Knock Jokes

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Noah.
Person 2: Noah who?
Person 1: Noah good place to get something to eat?

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Luke.
Person 2: Luke who?
Person 1: Luke through the peep hole and you'll see.

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Sadie.
Person 2: Sadie who?
Person 1: Sadie magic word and I'll disappear.

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Justin.
Person 2: Justin who?
Person 1: Justin time for dinner!

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Claire.
Person 2: Claire who?
Person 1: Claire the way -- I'm coming through!

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Mikey.
Person 2: Mikey who?
Person 1: Mikey doesn't fit in the keyhole. Let me in!

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Little old lady.
Person 2: Little old lady who?
Person 1: Wow, I didn't know you could yodell!

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Canoe.
Person 2: Canoe who?
Person 1: Canoe help me with my homework?

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Lettuce.
Person 2: Lettuce who?
Person 1: Lettuce in, it's cold out here!

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Figs.
Person 2: Figs who?
Person 1: Figs the doorbell -- it's broken!

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Leaf.
Person 2: Leaf who?
Person 1: Leaf me alone!

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Wooden shoe.
Person 2: Wooden shoe who?
Person 1: Wooden shoe like to hear another joke?

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Alpaca.
Person 2: Alpaca who?
Person 1: Alpaca the suitcase; you pack the trunk!

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Atch.
Person 2: Atch who?
Person 1: Bless you!

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Interrupting pirate.
Person 2: Interrup...
Person 1: ARRRRRRR!

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Boo.
Person 2: Boo who?
Person 1: Don't cry, it's just me!

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cow says.
Person 2: Cow says who?
Person 1: No, silly! A cow says "Mooooo!"

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Ketchup.
Person 2: Ketchup who?
Person 1: Ketchup with me and I'll tell you.

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Dozen.
Person 2: Dozen who?
Person 1: Dozen anyone want to let me in?

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Iowa.
Person 2: Iowa who?
Person 1: Iowa friend a couple dollars.

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Olive.
Person 2: Olive who?
Person 1: Olive you!

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Imma.
Person 2: Imma who?
Person 1: Imma gettin' tired of waiting -- let me in!

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Roach.
Person 2: Roach who?
Person 1: Roach you a letter. Didn't you get it?

Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Dishes.
Person 2: Dishes who?
Person 1: Dishes a nice place you've got here!

Person 1: Will you remember me in one minute?
Person 2: Yes.
Person 1: Knock-knock.
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Hey! You didn't remember me!

 

Funny Wordplay Jokes

Jokes About Animals

Q: What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?
A: A spelling bee.

Q: Where do cows go for entertainment?
A: The mooooo-vies!

Q: What kind of dinosaur loves to sleep?
A: A stega-snore-us.

Q: Why couldn't the pony sing?
A: Because she was a little hoarse.

Q: Where do sheep go to get their hair cut?
A: The baa-baa shop.

Q: What do you get when you cross a snake with a pie?
A: A pie-thon!

Q: What's the most musical part of the chicken?
A: The drumstick.

Q: What do you call a group of disorganized cats?
A: A cat-tastrophe.

Q: How many tickles does it take to get an octopus to laugh?
A: Ten-tickles.

Q: Why did the chicken get a penalty?
A: For fowl play.

Jokes About Food

Q: Where do you learn to make banana splits?
A: At sundae school.

Q: Why did the melon jump into the lake?
A: It wanted to be a water-melon.

Q: What's an astronaut's favorite candy?
A: A Mars bar.

Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
A: It was feeling crumb-y.

Q: What do you call cheese that's not yours?
A: Nach-o cheese.

Q: What do call it when you help a lemon that's in trouble?
A: Lemon-aid.

Q: Why did the banana go to the hospital?
A: He was peeling really bad.

Q: Why did the tomato turn red?
A: It saw the salad dressing.

Q: Which U.S. state has the smallest soft drinks?
A: Minnesota (as in, "mini-soda").

Q: Where do hamburgers go to dance?
A: They go to the meat-ball.

Jokes About Nature

Q: How does the ocean say hello?
A: It waves.

Q: What's the worst thing about throwing a party in space?
A: You have to planet.

Q: Why did the tree go to the dentist?
A: It needed a root canal.

Q: Why can't you trust atoms?
A: They make up everything!

Q: Why do moon rocks taste better than earth rocks?
A: Because they're meteor.

Q: How do you know when the moon has had enough to eat?
A: When it's full.

Q: What washes up on very small beaches?
A: Micro-waves.

Q: What did the tree say to the wind?
A: Leaf me alone!

Q: What kind of music do planets listen to?
A: Nep-tunes.

Q: What do you call a funny mountain?
A: Hill-arious!

Jokes About People

Q: Why did the opera singer go sailing?
A: She wanted to hit the high Cs.

Q: Why did the policeman go to the baseball game?
A: He'd heard that someone had stolen a base!

Q: When do doctors get mad?
A: When they run out of patients (as in, "patience").

Q: What did the judge say to the dentist?
A: Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth?

Q: Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?
A: In case he got a hole in one.

Q: Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?
A: He wanted to win the no-bell prize.

Q: What did the fisherman say to the magician?
A: Pick a cod, any cod!

Q: What do prisoners use to call each other?
A: Cell phones.

Q: What kind of shoes do all spies wear?
A: Sneak-ers.

Q: What is a cheerleader's favorite drink?
A: Root beer.

Jokes About School

Q: What do elves learn at school?
A: The elf-abet.

Q: Why was the math book sad?
A: Because it had so many problems.

Q: What did the calculator say to the math student?
A: You can count on me.

Q: Why did the boy bring the ladder to school?
A: He was going to high school.

Q: Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?
A: She couldn't control her pupils.

Q: Why was the student's report card wet?
A: It was below C level!

Q: What three candies can you find in every school?
A: Nerds, DumDums, and Smarties.

Q: What did the buffalo say to his kid when he dropped him off at school?
A: Bison (as in, "bye, son")!

Q: What's a snake's favorite subject?
A: Hisstory. 

Q: Why did the teacher wear sunglasses inside?
A: Her students were so bright!

Jokes About Different Objects

Q: Where do pencils go on vacation?
A: Pencil-vania.

Q: Why couldn't the bike stand up?
A: It was too tired (as in, "two-tired").

Q: Why did the drum take a nap?
A: It was beat.

Q: What did one penny say to another penny?
A: We make cents.

Q: Why are teddy bears never hungry?
A: Because they're always stuffed!

Q: What did the digital clock say to the grandfather clock?
A: Look, grandpa! No hands!

Q: What did one eye say to the other eye?
A: Don't look now, but something between us smells.

Q: What did the blanket say to the best?
A: Don't worry: I've got you covered!

Q: Why did the computer go to the doctor?
A: It had a virus.

Q: What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?
A: A tube-a toothpaste.

 

Easy Riddles for Kids

Q: What kind of lion never roars?
A: A dande-lion!

Q: What runs around a yard without actually moving?
A: A fence.

Q: What gets wetter the more it dries?
A: A towel.

Q: What is the longest word in the dictionary?
A: "Smiles," because there's a "mile" between each "s."

Q: What has a bed that you can't sleep in?
A: A river.

Q: What has four wheels and flies?
A: A garbage truck.

Q: When is a door not a door?
A: When it's a-jar.

Q: When does Friday come before Thursday?
A: In the dictionary.

Q: What comes down, but never comes up?
A: Rain.

Q: What starts with the letter "t," is filled with "t," and ends in "t"?
A: A teapot.

Q: What can be broken, but can't be held?
A: A promise.

Q: What has a face and two hands, but no arms or legs?
A: A clock.

Q: A cowboy rides into town on Friday, stays for three days, then leaves on Friday. How did he do it?
A: His horse's name was Friday.

Q: What never asks questions, but is often answered?
A: A doorbell.

Q: What kind of button doesn't unbutton?
A: A belly button.

Q: Everyone has it, and no one can lose it. What is it?
A: A shadow.

Once you're finished laughing it up, you should try these 101 Free Kid Activities. What are some of your favorite jokes for kids? Share them in the comments below!

Comments
Bryce in Hickory, NC
Oct. 17, 2018

Q:they said i was nice A:no i was not thats sooooooo funny for me!!!!! LOLLOLOLLLOLOLOLOLLLOLO

Bryce in Hickory, NC
Oct. 17, 2018

i know a good one:what did the duck say when he didnt have a bank account? answer:put it on my bill i think thats funny lol

Nancy in New York, NY
April 13, 2018

The problem is that I have been focusing on the negative part of marriage, not speaking to anyone about my failed marriage and pretending everything is okay by putting up fake smiles. My husband transformed into a beast, cheater and abuser. It was unbearable to see a man who once vowed to shield us as family transfer aggression to me and the kids, pushing us hard to the wall. But there is time, reason and season for everything either good or bad. I ran to priest manuka for solution which I eventually achieved through his extra ordinary 7days love spell prayers. Our differences were settled and every heart wounds healed within 7days. I am grateful my husband transformed again to an angel which he has always been. Thanks to our redeemer (HIDDEN) priest manuka Love healing Temple.

Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don't work.

Why did the clown cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

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