There isn’t a parent alive who couldn’t use an extra set of hands (or 10) now and again. For many, though, hiring help in the form of a full-time nanny or even part-time babysitter can be too much of a time and/or financial commitment. Another option? Hiring a mother’s helper (aka, a parent’s helper).
“A mother’s helper provides support to an at-home parent by assisting with child care and sometimes household-related tasks,” explains Michelle LaRowe, lead educator at Global Nanny Training. Mother’s helpers, in other words, hang with the kids while mom or dad tend to duties, such as making dinner, finishing up work or even just taking a much-needed break. The kids are engaged, and parents are able to get things done. It’s a win-win.
Here, LaRowe and other experts explain everything parents need to know about mother’s helpers.
What is a mother’s helper?
Unlike babysitters, who typically watch the kids while mom or dad are out of the house, a mother’s helper offers assistance while the parent(s) is home. Think of a mother’s helper as an “extra set of hands for child care and light household duties,” says Kristen Szapka, founder of A Nanny Match in New York City.
A mother’s helper can assist with more than one child, or tend to just one. For instance, if mom is feeding a new baby, a mother’s helper may occupy and play with an older sibling.
A mother’s helper = an “extra set of hands for child care and light household duties.”
— Kristen Szapka, founder of A Nanny Match
How old should a mother’s helper be?
There’s no hard and fast rule in terms of the age of mother’s helpers, but they’re often “younger caregivers, sometimes teenagers, looking to gain caregiving experience,” Szapka notes.
What is another name for a mother’s helper?
Depending on your family makeup and preference, you may refer to a mother’s helper as a parent’s helper or father’s helper. Or, similar to a “CIA” (counselor in training) at camp, a mother’s helper, in many cases, can be thought of as a babysitter in training.
Typical mother’s helper job description and duties
Mother’s helpers “provide support as directed while at-home parents remain the primary caregiver,” notes Alie Moya, founder of Brooklyn Manny and Nanny. Duties will vary depending on the family, but here are some common tasks, according to Szapka and Moya:
- Engaging the children in activities (coloring, reading, puzzles, hide-and-seek, etc.).
- Tidying and light housework (doing dishes, cleaning the playroom).
- Helping with homework.
- Making simple lunches.
- Supporting kids’ routines (snacktime, potty breaks, homework, etc.).
But let your imagination go wild — here are many other ways a mother’s helper can support you at home:
- Entertain the toddler while you feed, soothe, tend to a baby.
- Do the dishes while you play with the kids.
- Watch and act out “The Little Mermaid” for the millionth time.
- Play with the kids while you jump on a conference call.
- Get covered in paint and dirt.
- Allow you to take a much-needed nap/shower/bathroom break.
- Insert some energy when you’re lagging.
“A mother’s helper is essentially acting as an extra set of hands,” Moya says. “As trust between the parent and helper grows, they may occasionally care for the child for short periods, allowing the parent to run errands, with the parent always remaining readily accessible.”
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Where to find a mother’s helper
Find a mother’s helper
Depending on your family’s care needs, you can search for a mother’s helper near you on child care websites. It’s good to note, however, that caregivers on Care must be at least 18, so candidates you find on the Care platform may be more experienced and, thus, charge more per hour than younger mother’s helpers.
“Parents usually find mother’s helpers through local community boards, social media groups or personal recommendations,” notes Szapka.
Lauren Rodgers, a mom of two in Garwood, New Jersey, found her mother’s helper… next door! “Our neighbor’s daughter was always so nice and friendly to my two girls [6 and 4],” she says. “When she turned 11, I asked her if she wanted to hang with the girls a few hours a week while I got some work done in the house.”
“Parents usually find mother’s helpers through local community boards, social media groups or personal recommendations.”
— Kristen Szapka, founder of A Nanny Match
What to pay a mother’s helper
According to Szapka, the hourly rate for mother’s helpers can vary widely based on location, duties and experience, but it generally falls below the average rate of a more experienced nanny or sitter.
To find out more about mother’s helper rates, check out: How much should I pay a mother’s helper?
The bottom line
Hiring a mother’s helper can be a great way to get some help without a big commitment. Kids will love spending time with someone older — but not too much older — than them, and parents will love the time it affords them.
“Everyone is always happy when our mother’s helper comes over,” Rodgers says. “Even her mom, who’s glad her daughter is gaining experience and earning a little money.”
