Families hire nannies to provide caring and nurturing support while helping to raise their children. But what would you do if your child said that they dislike your nanny?
Co-president of the International Nanny Association and nanny of 22 years Becky Kavanagh advises talking directly with the nanny. Keeping communication open is essential to any nanny-family relationship.
But when your child is unable to clearly articulate their dislike, how as a parent can you spot the signs? We’ve identified some of the key ones to look out for:
1.Your Child Complains
Older children can bluntly tell you if they don’t like the nanny, so talk to them and determine what exactly they mean. “Older children tend to be set in their ways,” Kavanagh suggests. “They might say they don’t like a nanny, but it could mean they just don’t like that the new nanny has a different way of doing things.”
2. There is a Lack of Bonding
The first few weeks with a new nanny are hard for kids. It takes time to establish the nanny-child bond, and all sides — you, your child and the nanny — must give the relationship time as you adjust to the new dynamic. However, if your child still isn’t comfortable with the nanny after a month or two, it might be a sign your child truly dislikes her and it might be time to explore other options.
3. Your Child’s Behaviour Changes
“If your child is normally happy, but suddenly seems withdrawn, then something’s not right. Anything that’s not their usual behavior is something to worry about,” Kavanagh says. Watch for any changes in your child’s normal behavior. Is your daughter suddenly throwing temper tantrums or does she seem quieter than usual? These might be indications she’s unhappy with her nanny, and you should take her complaints seriously.
4. They Avoid Being Alone With Your Nanny
While it’s natural for children to prefer to be with their parents, you should take notice of any strong signs your child doesn’t want to be alone with the nanny. According to Kavanagh, your child might be trying to tell you he dislikes the nanny if he hides when the nanny arrives, pretends to be sick as a ploy to get you to stay home or can’t wait to see the nanny leave. “Parents should be really concerned if their child doesn’t want to be alone with the nanny,” she says. “If that’s the case, see what’s going on.”
5. Your Child Undermines the Nanny’s Authority
If your child refuses to help the nanny clean up toys or won’t listen to the nanny’s instructions, it could be a sign your child doesn’t respect the nanny’s authority — and possibly dislikes the nanny. If that’s the case, it’s possible your child thinks the nanny is too strict. As a solution, consider reviewing the family’s rules with the nanny and agree on acceptable tasks for your child to complete. In addition, remind your child to respect the nanny and to follow her directions.
What would you do if your child disliked the nanny? Share your tips and experiences with us using the comments box below.