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For families with dynamic schedules, having a live-in nanny can sound like the ideal scenario. There’s extra help right in your house when you need it, which offers peace of mind and stability that no other child care option can. Convenience aside, though, there are a number of often-overlooked factors families need to consider before hiring a live-in nanny.
“There are benefits to hiring a live-in nanny, including the convenience of having someone available for non-traditional schedules,” notes Stephanie Fornaro, founder and CEO of Hello, Nanny, a boutique agency in California and Texas. On the flip side, though, she adds, drawbacks include the privacy you’re giving up in exchange for ease.
Wondering if a live-in nanny is a good choice for your family? Here are expert-backed pros and cons to weigh before making your choice.
Key takeaways
- A live-in nanny can offer unmatched flexibility, reliability and continuity for families with demanding or unpredictable schedules, often making daily routines smoother for both parents and kids. That convenience can also come with financial efficiencies compared to juggling multiple caregivers.
- The biggest trade-offs tend to be privacy and boundaries: having another adult in your home can blur work hours, affect family dynamics and require clear agreements to avoid “job creep.” Lifestyle compatibility and strong communication are essential for the arrangement to feel sustainable rather than stressful.
- Live-in nanny arrangements carry added legal, logistical, and emotional complexities, from state labor laws to the realities of eventual separation when the job ends. Done well, they can be incredibly rewarding — but only when expectations, boundaries and backup plans are clearly established from the start.
Pros of hiring a live-in nanny
There are undeniable benefits to having a live-in nanny that even the best of live-out nannies can’t provide. Here are a few to consider.
You have more flexibility
Live-in nannies offer valuable flexibility. When you’re late for work, you know your nanny is there to help get the kids dressed and fed. If you’re late from work, they’re available for transportation, dinner prep and more. Additionally, if you have an unexpected trip, a live-in nanny can be there to provide agreed-upon overnight or weekend care, notes Fornaro.
Keep in mind, though, generally “live-in nannies have standard work hours,” explains Olivia Fountain, director of operations at the domestic staffing agency, Household Staffing, in Winter Park, Florida. “The hours can vary, but many work either 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. or 9 a.m. to 6 p.m.” So if you need them to work during off hours, Fountain notes, “a conversation needs to be had and they need to be compensated.”
“While live-in nannies don’t make less than standard nannies, the set-up usually benefits families financially.”
— Olivia Fountain, nanny and staffing expert
They’re more reliable than other forms of child care
Complementing the flexibility they provide, having a live-in nanny offers unmatched built-in reliability, notes Steven Laitmon, owner and CEO of The Calendar Group, a household staffing agency in Westport, Connecticut.
“Without a commute,” he says, “there are fewer late arrivals or weather-related cancellations.”
“Live-in nannies can also provide Immediate backup during illnesses, school closures or unexpected schedule changes,” he adds.
Kids’ routines are easier maintained
According to Fountain, the majority of folks who hire live-in nannies are dual-income families, where both parents have busy, sometimes unpredictable work schedules. Having a live-in nanny keeps schedules and routines running smoothly.
“Live-in nannies are also there to help with transitions during peak family hours,” adds Laitmon. (Think: dinner/bath/clean-up time.)
Additionally, Laitmon notes, because they live with you, live-in nannies typically have stronger child–caregiver bonds than most. “This daily continuity,” he says, “often leads to deeper trust and emotional security for children.”
Live-in nannies are generally more affordable
You may be able to negotiate a lower salary than you would pay a live-out nanny, because you’re also covering their room, board and other living expenses, such as utilities and, in some cases, food, a car and a cell phone. “While live-in nannies don’t make less than standard nannies, the set-up usually benefits families financially,” notes Fountain.
“In some cases,” adds Laitmon, “housing offsets higher hourly rates compared to multiple caregivers.” (Think pre-school + after-school nanny.)
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A live-in nanny can offer a new viewpoint
If your live-nanny is from another location or culture, they’ll bring invaluable exposure to new ideas. Your family may learn about interesting foods, traditions or learn a new language.
Cons of hiring a live-in nanny
While there are a number of benefits to having a live-in nanny, there also are a few things to consider before hiring one.
You have another person in the house
Even in the best scenarios, a live-in nanny will compromise your privacy a little, and the situation might take some getting used to. For instance, sometimes the nanny will join you for dinner and sometimes you’ll just want family time. Making the distinction can be awkward.
According to Fountain, this is the number one caveat families encounter after hiring a live-in nanny. “Many families don’t realize how much they’ll miss their privacy,” she explains. “When there’s a live-in nanny, families are rarely home alone, and inevitably things like arguments between spouses wind up happening when the nanny is under the same roof.”
However, Fornaro adds, the effects of this can be mitigated if you happen to have a detached unit on the property. On the flip side, notes Laitmon, “smaller spaces or families who value solitude may find the setup challenging.”
“A live-in nanny arrangement works best when expectations, boundaries and communication are clearly established from the start.”
— Steven Laitmon, household staffing expert
Work hours can get blurry
Something you definitely don’t want to be guilty of as an employer? Job creep. “Without clear expectations, work hours can unintentionally expand,” notes Laitmon. “That’s not fair to the nanny.”
And even if you find it easy to draw a line between your nanny’s working and non-working hours, kids (rarely known for their exemplary boundaries) may have a harder time — especially if the nanny is at home.
You still need back-up care
While live-in nannies are generally more convenient and flexible than live-outs, they’re human beings with immune systems and outside lives, so backup care is still needed from time to time.
Your lifestyles may not mesh
What a live-out nanny does on their own time doesn’t really affect you — the hours they keep, the meals they cook, etc. But with a live-in, “lifestyle compatibility is really important,” notes Laitmon, who adds that “differences in habits, routines or values may create friction.”
For instance, do they like to go out at night and come home late? Cook elaborate, fragrant meals? Go for a jog super early? Have friends over?
It’s important to find out their general lifestyle on the front-end, notes Fornaro, since they’re working — and living — with you. “You want to know how they manage their personal time and how they will respect your family’s space,” she says.
In addition to having a conversation, make sure you have a work agreement or live-in nanny contract agreed upon before they start.
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There are legal and logistical complexities
When you have an employee live with you, there are a number of rules and legalities — some federal- or state-mandated. “Household employers must comply with specific labor laws, tax requirements and clear employment agreements,” Laitmon notes.
Before hiring a live-in nanny, get to know the nanny and the live-in nanny laws in your state, as they’re very nuanced.
As an example, families may, in some cases, deduct the value of housing or meals for convenience, but they are still required to pay at least minimum wage to their nanny. In some states, though, (such as Massachusetts) housing deductions are prohibited altogether, and offering housing can trigger landlord–tenant obligations. (For the most part, though, live-in nannies do not pay rent.)
Live-in nannies are like family
A good thing? Yes. But just like any family, problems crop up in the best relationships — and you can’t send the live-in nanny home for the night while everyone cools off.
The end of the job is more involved
When it’s time for you and your nanny to part ways, they have to move out. That alone is much different than just giving two week’s notice. And if everyone is attached to a beloved nanny, it can be emotionally tough as well.
Further, Laitmon notes, there’s a big “dependency risk” with live-ins. “If a live-in nanny leaves unexpectedly, families can feel particularly vulnerable,” he says.
A final note about hiring a live-in nanny
As with any child care situation, weighing the pros and cons is crucial before making a decision. “Live-in nannies are not ideal for every home,” says Laitmon. “That said, they can be great for some families.”The key, he says, is doing your research and laying everything out in the open from the start. “A live-in nanny arrangement works best when expectations, boundaries and communication are clearly established from the start.”
