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Where Do Babies Come From? The Best and Funniest Answers from Parents

Feeling lost for words when your kids ask about the birds and the bees? Check out these 12 serious -- and hilarious -- parent explanations.

Where Do Babies Come From? The Best and Funniest Answers from Parents

Whether you have a baby in your belly or just a child with a budding curiosity, at some point your kids will likely ask you: “Where do babies come from?” Although parenting books tell us honesty is the best policy when answering this question, you may find yourself putting your foot in your mouth when your child asks about the birds and the bees. Some of these 12 parents have great explanations.

The rest probably should have stuck with the stork theory!
 

  1. “I give my kids age-appropriate advice and keep my explanations short and simple. If they need more information they will ask.” — Sarah H., Fort Worth, Texas
     
  2. “I told my daughter that babies are made when mommies and daddies have too much love. When it overflows, God gives the family a baby to love.” — Heather F., Missouri


     

  3. “I think it’s important to tell kids the truth so they don’t get incorrect information from kids at school. I showed my daughter a book that has pictures of an egg and sperm. I explained they are cells from a mommy and daddy that make a baby.” — June B., New Albany, Ohio
     
  4. “I know parenting experts say you’re supposed to tell the truth, but I like to see what my kids already know and go off that.” — Chelsea D., Ranchero Cucamonga, California
     
  5. “I told my kids, ‘After Mom and Dad got married, we decided we wanted a baby. So we grew one in my belly.’ It’s the truth — just missing a lot of details!” — Danielle M., Rosemont, California
     
  6. “People tell me I should be honest with my kids, but they have their own theory. My kids think the baby grows in the mom’s bellybutton and the doctor cuts the baby out — so I’m sticking to their story!” — Tatiana H., Columbus, Georgia
     
  7. “Kids have short attention spans. I give my kids some information and hope they move on to the next topic!” — Anonymous, Columbus, Georgia
     
  8. “If my boys start asking questions about where babies come from, I tell them to go ask Daddy!” — Jenn S., Bristol, Connecticut
     
  9. “My 4-year-old son has seen a lot of nature videos of animals giving birth and lions mating, so I am honest with him when he asks questions. But I probably should have explained how the baby gets out of a mom’s belly. He thinks babies are born from a mom’s rear end!” — Olivia N., Las Vegas, Nevada
     
  10. “When my daughter asked where babies come from, I turned the question around on her. ‘Where do you think babies come from?’ I asked. She replied, ‘When two people love each other the dad buys a pumpkin seed and gives it to the mom. Then her stomach gets big like a pumpkin!’ I was speechless, so I said ‘That’s right, honey!'” — Crystal M., Ann Arbor, Michigan


     

  11. “I am expecting, and my 5-year-old asked how babies are made. I told him ‘God took a piece of me and a piece of Daddy and he put them together to make a new baby.’ My 2-year-old studied me carefully and said ‘I don’t see any bites out of you! What piece did God take?'” — Emily Clark, Michigan
     
  12. “When my son asked how the seed gets inside the mom, I took a deep breath and started to explain. He covered his ears and said he didn’t want to hear any more! Since he didn’t want to listen, I showed him the movie ‘Look Who’s Talking,’ instead.” — Anonymous, Orlando, Florida
     

For more laughs, head on over to these 6 Hilarious Quotes About Giving Birth.

Have you had the “Where do babies come from” conversation with your kids? How did you handle it? Tell us about it in the comments below!
 

Jennifer Gilbert is a freelance writer, wife and mother of two children. She enjoys reading, writing, traveling and spending time with her family.