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Due diligence is required to hire any type of nanny, but for families looking to bring in a live-in nanny, extra measures are in order — particularly during the interview.
“When considering a live-in nanny, you’re not only considering if this person is going to be a suitable child care provider for your children, you’re considering if this person is going to be a suitable housemate for your family,” explains Michelle LaRowe Conover, lead educator at Global Nanny Training. In other words: You need to make sure you mesh in every way possible.
It’s important to cover typical babysitter/nanny interview questions when searching for the right person, but you should also dig a little deeper when interviewing potential live-in nannies. “When it comes to hiring a live-in nanny, you need to determine if inviting this person to share your home 24/7 will be a blessing or a curse,” LaRowe says.
From background questions to lifestyle inquiries, here’s what to ask a potential live-in nanny during the interview.
Key takeaways
- Hiring a live-in nanny requires deeper due diligence than a typical nanny search, since you’re choosing both a caregiver and a full-time housemate. Compatibility, emotional intelligence and prior live-in experience matter just as much as child care skills.
- Go beyond standard questions in your interview to cover child-rearing philosophy, boundaries, logistics and lifestyle fit. Asking scenario-based and open-ended questions helps reveal how a nanny will handle real-life dynamics inside your home.
- Clear expectations around privacy, schedules, household duties and communication are essential for long-term success. Even with all the right questions, trusting your gut about overall family fit is critical.
Questions to ask potential live-in nannies
Aren’t sure what topics to cover when meeting with potential live-in nannies? Here, experts share the questions you should be asking, along with the best, most thoughtful answers.
Ask about training, experience and goals
Experience is key when looking for a nanny who will live in your home. You want a caregiver who has a broad knowledge of child care and has taken emergency training courses to prepare for all situations.
1. How many years have you been a nanny?
“The very first question I ask anyone applying for a live-in nanny role is whether they’ve done it before,” notes Rachael Hudson-Svolis, co-founder of Oceanside Staffing, a nanny and household staffing agency in Palm Beach.
“Living where you work requires a distinct set of soft skills and a high level of emotional intelligence,” she continues. “Successfully navigating the blurred boundaries between personal time and professional responsibility is nuanced, and it’s something that can’t truly be learned in theory.”
Put another way: Experience is a big bonus.
2. Do you have references?
Good references are key for both live-out and live-in nannies, but they can be particularly useful for the latter, where you want to learn about potential hires’ behavior both on and off the clock, notes Hudson-Svolis.
“Prior live-in experience also allows a nanny to provide a reference from a family who can speak to their professionalism both when they are on and off duty,” she says. “Without that validation, it’s difficult to confidently assess whether a candidate fully understands the unique expectations and dynamics of a live-in role.”
3. Why do you want to be a live-in nanny?
‘According to Stephanie Fornaro, founder and CEO of Hello Nanny!, a boutique agency in California and Texas, finding out what appeals to them about a live-in arrangement can be helpful.
“You want someone who shows a genuine desire to become a part of the family and who understands the unique nature of live-in care,” she says. “This role goes beyond just childcare.”
4. Can you explain one or two previous nanny-related work experiences?
Fornaro adds: “You want to hear about their flexibility and ability to problem-solve, especially in dynamic or unexpected situations that often arise in a live-in setting.”
“Living where you work requires a distinct set of soft skills and a high level of emotional intelligence. Successfully navigating the blurred boundaries between personal time and professional responsibility is nuanced.”
— Rachael Hudson-Svolis, nanny staffing expert
5. What are your short-term and long-term goals as a caregiver?
Families should seek to find out how a live-in nanny sees themselves fitting into the family dynamic over time, Fornaro says.
“You want to hear that they’re looking for a long-term commitment and can envision themselves becoming a stable part of the family,” she notes.
Other questions to ask, per LaRowe and Fornaro, include:
- Why are you leaving or why have you left your previous position?
- Do you have emergency training in CPR and first aid? (A must for anyone working with kids!)
- Would you be willing to consent to a background check?
- What other certifications or classes have you taken? (Keep an eye out for some of these nanny training courses and certifications.)
Questions about child care philosophy
Your ideal nanny should see eye-to-eye with you and your child-rearing values and beliefs. A live-in caregiver will be spending lots of time with your child, so their philosophy on raising kids is very important, as they will be nurturing your child alongside you and the rest of your family.
6. What will my child be doing on any given day?
Open-ended questions like this are a great way to gain insight on potential live-in nannies, according to Blanka Molnar, a holistic therapist, Conscious Parenting coach, mom and former au pair.
“For example, you can say: ‘Let’s say it’s a rainy day. What would you do with our child?’” Molar notes. “Asking questions like this can show you if they’re proactive.”
7. How do you discipline children? Give an example.
Learning about their caring style is crucial, Molnar says.
“Ask about different scenarios and what they would do,” she continues. “For instance, say: ‘You see that my child hit somebody on the playground, how would you handle the situation?’”
Also, try to gauge their views on “house rules” that are important to you. For instance, you can ask:
- How would you handle fighting siblings?
- How do you comfort children?
- What is your view on nutrition for children?
- How do you handle kids who are picky eaters?
- How do you make sure kids get enough exercise?
- What are your views on screen time?
You want to know their general thoughts, but also how they’ll stay in step with your guidelines, Molnar says. “For example, we don’t eat junk food,” she says. “I would want to find out how committed a potential live-in would be to sticking to our family’s rules.”
Ask about logistics of the live-in nanny job
This is where your interview questions will really differ from questions you’d ask a live-out nanny. While there’s some overlap, this is your opportunity to get an idea of how well you’d work and live together.
8. What type of setup do you require or have experience with?
This is a critical piece of the conversation, notes Hudson-Svolis. “Live-in nannies come from a wide range of housing arrangements, and it’s important to remember that not every live-in situation is the right fit for every nanny,” she says.
“Accommodations can vary significantly, and comfort levels differ,” she continues. “For example, a private bedroom with a shared bathroom may not offer the level of privacy a career nanny expects, while a guest house or basement apartment with a private entrance may be far more appealing to someone who has worked in a similar environment before.”
Also, keep in mind, transparency is crucial here from you, as well. “Families need to be honest about the living arrangements they’re offering, and nannies should feel comfortable sharing their expectations,” Hudson-Svolis adds. “When those details are a match from the start, it sets the foundation for a long-term, happy placement.”
9. How do you plan to balance your personal life and professional duties?
A good answer, notes Fornaro, should show they’ve thought carefully about how they’ll handle their privacy, downtime and how they’ll integrate into the family’s daily routine without feeling overwhelmed.
10. How do you plan to maintain boundaries and privacy while living in someone else’s home?
You’re looking for an answer that shows they’re respectful of personal space but can also be integrated into the family dynamic when needed, according to Fornaro.
11. How do you handle situations where you may need time off, or where you need to take personal days while living with a family?
This, notes Fornaro, is specific to the live-in role. “You want to hear that they can manage their needs while respecting the family’s schedule and understanding the dynamics of living in your home.”
12. What boundaries do you set with families you work with when it comes to personal space, quiet time or vacations?
The nanny should have a clear understanding of boundaries and be able to maintain a professional yet friendly relationship, says Fornaro.
13. Are you comfortable with light household duties, such as meal prep and laundry? How would you prioritize these tasks along with childcare?
“It’s important that the nanny can balance childcare duties with helping around the house and has experience managing these tasks without neglecting either,” notes Fornaro.
Other questions, per LaRowe, include:
- What are some of your favorite recipes?
- Do you have a well-functioning car with room for car seats?
- How do you like to communicate with your employer about the child’s day? (daily log, text, call, etc.?)
“Based on my experience, what’s super important, apart from feeling like you can trust a live-in nanny or babysitter, is that they’re overall compatible with your family.”
— Michelle LaRowe Conover, experienced nanny educator
Lifestyle questions to ask live-in nannies
If you have a live-out nanny, you don’t need to worry too much about what they’re doing in their free time, but with live-in, it can directly impact you. It’s important, LaRowe notes, to consider how your family’s interests and lifestyle meshes with that of a potential live-in nanny’s.
While these types of questions are highly individualized, here are a few general questions that can help you get an idea of how your lifestyles will work together.
- What is your routine when you have personal time or days off while living in someone else’s home?
- What type of things do you like to do on the weekend?
- Do you smoke or drink?
Additional considerations
Knowing what a potential live-in caregiver expects from you and your family is essential when developing a successful relationship, so be sure to find out what their priorities are and what you can do for your nanny.
- In your opinion, what’s the most important part of being a great nanny?
- How would your previous families describe you?
- What would you like from me as a potential employer?
- Are you introverted/extroverted?
- What are some of your hobbies and interests?
Every interview is different, but these questions should help you get started and on your way to finding the perfect live-in nanny.
A final thought about interviewing live-in nannies
In addition to asking all of the “right” questions, don’t ignore your gut feelings. “Based on my experience, what’s super important, apart from feeling like you can trust a live-in nanny or babysitter, is that they’re overall compatible with your family,” LaRowe says. “Having a live-in situation can be wonderful or awful, depending on the person.”
