{"id":84605,"date":"2024-07-02T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2024-07-02T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.care.com\/c\/?p=84605"},"modified":"2025-02-14T02:24:21","modified_gmt":"2025-02-14T02:24:21","slug":"how-couples-can-split-the-work-of-finding-child-care","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.care.com\/c\/how-couples-can-split-the-work-of-finding-child-care\/","title":{"rendered":"Finding child care is an exhausting job: Here\u2019s how partners can split the work"},"content":{"rendered":"

Finding the perfect child care for your family can feel like winning the lottery. But unlike walking into a store and buying a ticket, the road to the reward takes work (or, as the New York Times<\/a> put it: It’s “a journey.”). In addition to researching options, weighing how they’ll work with your child, calculating costs, touring facilities and\/or interviewing providers, there’s also registering for waitlists and\/or conducting trial runs with babysitters or nannies. Journey? Sounds more like an expedition — an expedition that, not surprisingly, women typically embark on alone.<\/p>

“Finding child care on a long-term basis and for date nights often lands in the women’s lap, as it’s a task that falls under the invisible load of motherhood,” explains Alyza Weinberg<\/a>, an adolescent and perinatal psychotherapist at Arbit Counseling in Washington D.C. “This load describes the hidden physical, mental and emotional labor that goes into ensuring households run smoothly and that kids are happy and safe.” Finding child care, Weinberg notes, falls under the mental labor category, which “describes the planning and coordinating of day-to-day activities of the family.” <\/p>

Need child care, but don’t want to devote a 40-hour (unpaid) workweek to the search? Here’s how couples can successfully divide this surprisingly arduous task. <\/p>

“Finding child care on a long-term basis and for date nights often lands in the women’s lap, as it’s a task that falls under the invisible load of motherhood.”<\/p>— Alyza Weinberg, adolescent and perinatal psychotherapist<\/cite><\/blockquote><\/figure>

Why the work of finding child care often falls on women<\/h2>

It isn’t a coincidence that the child care search usually winds up being “women’s work<\/a>.” Here are a few reasons why:<\/p>