In most jobs, it’s important to ensure you’re compensated fairly, but that is especially true for nannies. Being a nanny is rewarding, but it’s also a demanding, dynamic position that requires specialized skills, training and effort. Despite this, nannies are often underpaid for the valuable and vital work they do. If you’ve been in a nanny role for awhile, but haven’t seen an increase in pay or benefits, there’s a good chance that it’s time to ask for a raise.
There are a lot of reasons why nannies might be qualified to receive a pay raise. Perhaps the number of kids you care for has changed or the families needs have grown dramatically since your last performance review. Maybe you’ve just completed your education or sought new child care certifications that make you even more qualified. Whatever the case, “children’s needs and care change dramatically year over year, so it’s important to align your salary with your changing job expectations,” says Elizabeth Malson, the president of the U.S. Nanny Institute.
Here, Malson and other experts share their most useful tips and successful strategies for how to ask for a raise as a nanny.
When is the right time for a nanny to ask for a raise?
“A good time to ask for a raise is when you renew your annual work agreement,” Malson says. Typically, this would include updating your nanny contract, as well as discussing performance pay and benefits.
If your employer doesn’t already offer a performance review, you may need to take the initiative to request one — usually on an annual basis. “It’s too soon to ask for a raise with less than six to nine months of tenure, but you don’t want to go more than a year without having a performance review,” Malson says.
“It’s too soon to ask for a raise with less than six to nine months of tenure, but you don’t want to go more than a year without having a performance review.”
— Elizabeth Malson, president of the U.S. Nanny Institute.
Outside of performance review, nannies should also consider asking for a raise whenever significant changes occur in their roles, adds Joan Canning, a California-based gentle sleep coach, postpartum doula and nanny with more than two decades of experience. These changes might include:
- Caring for additional children or infants.
- A change in location that increases commuting time.
- Added job duties, such as meal prep, cleaning or errands.
How to prepare to ask for a nanny raise
Preparation is the most important part of asking for a raise as a nanny, the experts stress. Here’s what to do before you start the conversation.
Research nanny pay rates
“Nannies should stay informed about the current rates in their specific location,” Canning says. “This involves the rates for private hire positions and within local nanny agencies and referral companies.”
What are the going nanny rates in your area? You can use our child care rates calculator to estimate current hourly nanny rates in your city. Additionally, Malson suggests reviewing nanny job postings that include salary information to help compare your rate. You could even use these as examples with your current employer.
An average nanny raise could be anywhere from an additional $1/hour per year of employment to even more if your role has changed significantly. Arissan Nicole, a career and workplace coach based in Seattle, says it’s also important to factor in a cost of living increase. “This is usually between 3-5%, and should be added to any merit increase you’re asking for,” she explains.
Review your skills, training and contributions
“I always advise going into a conversation around compensation having done your research and prepared to answer the question, ‘Why do you deserve a raise?’” Nicole advises.
According to the experts, assessing your skills and performance prior to asking for a raise should include:
- Verifying that you’ve met expectations in the current work period, such as attendance, goals for the children and quality of care.
- Documenting any new training or certifications.
- Identifying ways your role has changed since your hire date or last review.
- Making a list of ways you have gone above and beyond in your job.
- Identifying future goals for your role, such as taking on more work or pursuing additional education.
Decide on your bottom line
Malson suggests having a few options in mind when considering your ideal raise, and then ranking them in order of personal importance. “If your primary goal is a dollar-per-hour raise, then start with that,” she says. But, if that isn’t possible for some reason, she adds that you could ask for a second choice, like an annual training budget of $500. A third acceptable option may be two additional days of paid vacation.
Before you start the conversation, know the answer to the following questions:
- What pay raise amount are you hoping to get?
- What’s the minimum amount you will accept?
- Are you open to additional benefits in lieu of a raise? If so, which ones?
“Providing options versus an ultimatum creates more opportunities for both parties to find a middle ground,” Malson says.
Know your “why”
“Before asking for a raise, nannies should think through the reason,” Malson says. “Are they seeking a cost of living increase based on reliable performance over the past year, an increase due to more responsibilities or additional pay for advanced skills learned through training and certification? All jobs provide a service for pay, so having a rationale for the pay increase will be important.”
How to ask for a raise when you’re a nanny
Once you’ve done the hard work to prepare to ask for a raise, here are some expert tips to help the conversation go smoothly.
1. Be clear about your intentions
Your employer needs time to prepare for conversations about pay and performance too, so give them a heads up that you’d like to meet. “Let them know you’d like to schedule time to update the work agreement, discuss job performance, talk about any changes in care that are needed and discuss a pay increase,” Malson says.
If you aren’t sure exactly what to say, Nicole offers the following scripts:
- “I’ve been working with you for two years now and have absolutely loved it! It would be great to sit down with you and have a discussion around my salary. Are you available next Monday?”
- “As we close out this year and look to the next, I’d like to find a time to discuss my role, how it’s developed over the year and what that looks like moving forward.”
2. Designate an appropriate time and place to meet
Along with your employer, choose a time and place to meet that is convenient for both of your schedules and eliminates distractions. “Consider having the conversation outside the home and not when the nanny is ‘on the clock,’” Canning says. “This neutral setting can help maintain a professional tone.”
3. Present your request clearly and confidently
If you’ve done adequate research and a self-review, then you already have all the information you need to negotiate successfully and answer any questions from your employer, so go for it! A successful raise request can be broken down into the following steps, Malson says:
- Highlight your contributions.
- State the request.
- Share the rationale.
Tramelle D. Jones, a strategic career and workplace wellness coach with TDJ Consulting, adds that your request will be stronger and better received if you provide concrete evidence of how you contribute to the family.
“Include positive impacts on the child’s milestones, the structure you’ve added to schedules and additional enrichments you’ve included in their weekly and monthly routines,” she says. “Have this list ready to point to during a scheduled conversation, and at the end of the meeting, share it with them. Let it be the last reminder of your request.”
4. Don’t expect an immediate answer
“Respect the employer’s need for time to make a decision, understanding that they may research local rates and requirements,” Canning says. If needed, set a timeline to continue the conversation or a date by which they will have a decision ready.
5. Be prepared to negotiate
Remember that asking for a raise isn’t necessarily a “yes” or “no” conversation — there is always room for discussion, Canning says.
“In case of a rejection, treat it as a business decision, and explore potential areas for negotiation. Like in many business scenarios, there might be room for compromise,” she says. “Nannies should remember that, although their role often may feel like a relationship, it’s fundamentally a contract. While forming strong bonds with the family is ideal, approaching the conversation with a business mindset is crucial.”
“Nannies should remember that, although their role often may feel like a relationship, it’s fundamentally a contract. While forming strong bonds with the family is ideal, approaching the conversation with a business mindset is crucial.”
— Joan Canning, gentle sleep coach, postpartum doula and nanny
How to negotiate if the answer is no
If your request for a raise is unsuccessful, Nicole says your next step should be to ask if they’d be open to other adjustments, such as additional benefits, training or other perks. Go back to the wish list you brainstormed while preparing to ask for the raise, or ask your employer what solutions they’d be willing to offer instead.
Most importantly, pick a time to revisit the conversation. “Ask them what they need to see in order to feel a raise is warranted and when you can revisit the topic,” Nicole says. “You want to be able to walk away from that conversation with actionable steps you can take and a date already planned for the next compensation discussion.”
The bottom line
“Initiating a conversation about a raise can be delicate, but it’s essential,” Canning says. Not only does asking for a raise ensure that you’re paid fairly for the hard work you do, but it also asserts that you are a professional whose talents, skills and training add value to the families who employ you.
Conversations about pay are never easy, but with a bit of research into nanny pay rates, a thorough review of your skills and an open, productive conversation with your employer, it’s possible to negotiate the boost in pay and benefits that will keep you fulfilled in your role for years to come.
