How Should You Ask for Time Off for Vacations and Holidays?

June 27, 2018

6 common questions about getting time off when you're a nanny, babysitter, or other caregiver.

Remember that being a nanny or caregiver is just like any other job. When you want to take a vacation or a day off, you need approval from your employer first.

And when you first get hired, talk about your terms -- salary, hours and benefits (like vacation!) -- and come to an agreement on what works best for you and your employer.

Here are six questions caregivers often have about taking time off.

  1. What Kind of Time Off Can You Take?
    One of the items to discuss before starting a new job is time off -- and whether it's paid or unpaid. According to the International Nanny Association's (INA) 2013 Annual Salary and Benefits Survey, 66 percent of nannies are given paid holidays. Which days and for how long vary among families. The most common ones are:

    • New Year's Day
    • Memorial Day
    • Independence Day
    • Labor Day
    • Thanksgiving
    • Christmas

    The personal vacation days also vary. It's common to get two weeks off. Maybe one week overlaps with the family's vacation and one week is a time of your choosing.

    And according to the INA survey, 47 percent of nannies get paid sick days -- usually about four or five.

  2. When Should You Talk About Time Off?
    It's important to map out with your employer how much vacation time is OK, which holidays are free and how many sick days are allowed. And what is paid versus unpaid!

    "It's best to negotiate time off at the same time that you negotiate your [pay]," says executive coach and author of "Find Your Sweet Spot," Karen Elizaga. If there are particular holidays that are important to you, mention them early. Holidays are a busy time for everyone, and some families may need support during Thanksgiving or Christmas.

    You'll also want to plan out when you would like to take vacation time. Many families have their own vacations scheduled. Find out when they are and if they want you to go with them on the family vacation. If you'll be staying home, is that time paid or unpaid?

    Having these conversations early is essential for avoiding last-minute conflicts. "The worst thing to do would be to ask the family two weeks before you decide to hop on a plane to Costa Rica," says 10-year nanny veteran, Anna Fox, from Los Angeles. "Figure out what works for you and the family. That way both parties can enter into an agreement, and all is set in advance."

  3. How Do You Guarantee Time Off?
    The easiest way to settle on time off is to include it in your work agreement. Though not legally required, a nanny contract provides a framework for you and your employer to set clear expectations from the start and get everything in writing.

  4. How Should You Schedule Your Time Off?
    Once you and your employer have agreed on vacation time, get it on the books. Many families like to keep a shared calendar -- paper or electronic -- where everyone can see planned days off. The calendar can of course be flexible, as needs and events change throughout the year. The key is to make sure that everyone understands the rules about scheduling and how to keep everyone informed.

    This way, your boss has time to plan and possibly hire backup child care.

  5. How Should You Deal With Last-Minute or Unexpected Time Off?
    Not all time off can be planned. We all get sick, have family emergencies or unpredictable events that require days off. Employers are people too, and they understand that. The main thing is to set up a notification system that allows you to reach your family easily to let them know that you will be out. Some families communicate via text, while others like email or the phone. Find out what works best for your employer and use their system.

  6. What Are the Keys to Success When Taking Time Off?
    The most important part of taking time off is being truthful with your employer. "Honesty is the best policy," offers Tammy Gold, child care expert at Gold Parent Coaching. "We're all allowed personal days," she says. You just don't want to be caught taking a sick day, and have your employer see a picture you post on Instagram of you and your friend at the beach.

The main thing is to not leave this planning to the last minute. Keeping the lines of communication open will help you and your employer maintain a trusting relationship.


Tiffany Smith has written for All You, Time for Kids and the Boston Globe. And, as a former babysitter, she knows a lot about fun games to play with kids. Follow her on Twitter at @tiffanyiswrite​​​​​​

Tips and stories from parents and caregivers who’ve been there.

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