It’s not easy to tweet while parenting, but the moms and dads of Twitter seem to pull it off — with equal parts wit and woe — every single week. Great work surviving another week out there ???! Here are the best parenting tweets for the week of May 18-24, 2019.
1. Toddlers are an enigma.
Toddlers are funny because they’ll say “No” to everything they need to live but if there’s a deflated balloon in the gutter they’re all “OMG I NEED THAT!”
— Daddy’s Digest (@daddysdigest) March 18, 2019
2. We call this MythBusters for new parents.
Me: The whole “terrible two’s” thing is a myth.
Friend: That’s good to know.
Me: It’s actually much worse than that.
— WTFDAD (@daddydoubts) May 19, 2019
3. Because sharing is overrated.
Me: Want to go tell your brothers the Mac and Cheese is ready?
3yo: No Thanks. I don’t want to share with anyone.
— Cydni Beer (@cydbeer) May 20, 2019
4. This familiar story knows no bounds.
[husband’s funeral]
My kid: Dad said I could have a cookie.— Mama Pajama (@mamapjs1) May 20, 2019
5. Caution: bubble-making can blow your mind.
If I’ve learned anything as a parent, it’s that blowing bubbles is a marathon, not a sprint.
— Erin De Boer (@erin_de_boer) May 20, 2019
6. It’s hard to find a Tooth Fairy you can trust these days.
One of these days my kids are going to figure out the tooth fairy isn’t the forgetful little turd I’ve always accused her of being
— Katie (@good_one_rick) May 23, 2019
7. (See above)
If you haven't had a tooth wrapped in a napkin in your jacket pocket for a week, are you even a mom?
— I Just Sat Down. (@anxiouscougar) May 23, 2019
8. Nailed it.
At dinner:
Hubs: “you know what would make this REALLY good?”
5: “a little less complaining from you for a start”
It’s official, I have a favorite child
— Mother Cussr (@MotherCussr) May 24, 2019
9. This might be better than the spa.
Ever gone to the bathroom and thought, you know what this experience is missing? A toddler holding my hands and singing Row Your Boat. Parenthood makes it possible.
— MichiMama (@michimama75) May 24, 2019
10. Always rooting for you, son.
My son is on a 4-day “spill water or milk on the table” streak and at this point, I kind of just want to see how far he gets.
— Tired Dad of 2 (@Tired_Dad_of_2) May 24, 2019
