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I'm pregnant and single. Any tips on how to stay positive?

User
May 19, 2015

Every time I turn around I feel like I see a happy couple preparing for the arrival of a new baby. I am single and preparing on my own. It is lonely and I feel like all the joy is being sucked out of this time in my life. How can I find joy in the upcoming birth of my son?

Answers

Nothing can replace that bond you crave for a family unit when you're pregnant. The hormones make it really intense some times. (Been there) The best thing to do is to get closer with family and friends. A mom or dad would be really good right now, so if you're lucky enough to have one, let them know how you're feeling and that you'd really appreciate that person investing in you and baby to have a special relationship that you and baby are going to need. Go pick up a few baby things, and start getting baby's room ready. (You can get really affordable things used) Whatever the circumstances of the conception, vow not to look at the baby as a mistake or a 'bad' thing. Celebrate with yourself and him, everything that's going to be great about him. Remind yourself (and him) every day how smart and beautiful and strong and kind you both are. That positivity is vitally important.

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Dear Heaven, I am a single Mother myself. I feel what you are feeling. Please don't get discouraged, you don't want you body to produce to much cortisol which is a stress hormone not good for you or baby. If you have family please turn to them and share your feelings, same goes for close friends. If you do not have a "safety net" there are wonderfully organizations out there! Just dial 211 on your telephone. Also if you are in the Santa Clarita Valley, there is an amazing organization called Single Mothers Outreach. I feel you may be suffering from some depression, if you can why not try the Child and Family Center also in Santa Clarita. I wish you all the best sweetheart, and trust me when you hold that little guy in your arms for the first time your life will change for the better. We Mom's will do anything for our children, you will find the strength encourage to provide what your son needs most, love, feeling safe and alowing him to learn in his new environment. All the best, Lori Agovino

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Get an aupair and have her come while you are still expecting and go through the motions with you. They usually stay a year but most have the ability to stay two years. You will develop a really wonderful bond with her and create really special pre baby memories

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User in Ionia, MI
May 2, 2017

You're going to be mommy and daddy, and normally a parent has to deal with the child being connected to either the mother or the father more, well not you sunshine you get all the love from your precious baby boy :) stay positive, god has blessed you remember that. <3

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User in Durham, NC
May 2, 2017

Your support system is crucial at this time. Surround yourself with people who will rejoice with you. Select one or two that can go shopping with you, decorate the nursery with you, maybe even accompany you to ultrasounds and checkups. If you know who the baby's godparent(s) will be, they might make a great choice. Having someone to rejoice with you over the little details of your baby and all the preparations you're making will do a lot to shine some light on the joys of your situation. :)

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User in Smiths, AL
May 2, 2017

Just know that you are not alone. There are several single pregnant mothers out here, and will be many more in the future. There are married women who have gotten divorce and are single parents now. Don't spend time thinking about being single and pregnant, but focus on just be the best mother you can be to your child. I'm sure that you will be a great one!! Always remember, a child never asks to be in this world..but when they arrive, shower them with love, safety, happiness, and assurance that they are not alone!! Every real mother finds a way to make that happen regardless of their circumstances!! You will be great!!!

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Just Always Remember: You Don't Need A Partner To Expirence The MIracle Of A Pregnancy And Look On The Bright Side Atleast Your Having A Baby And That Could Be Your 'Partner' For Your Life Becuase No ONe Can Break The Bond Of A Mother And Baby.

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The joy in the birth of a new child does not come from the couple merely, but also the baby too! You are bringing a new life into this world, and no matter how you do that, it is a great joy!

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You can raise your son with no arguments or debates on how to do it!

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You dont need anybody to be happy with your baby! Be independent! Women are stronger then men! :) they cant do nothing like we can:)

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User in Casper, WY
May 2, 2017

Enlist your family to help.

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User in Muncie, IN
May 2, 2017

Find some other single mommies to talk to!

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Remember this is about you and your child! Take it from someone with experience. Even pregnant women with a significant other are not happy and parenting becomes even harder when it's shared. I just had a son and my husband has never helped me out I feel like a single mother. One day your son will grow up to appreciate everything you did alone and think of you as super mom! Be happy you will miss being pregnant once he's out! Go get a mani and pedi. It will make you feel positive and even more beautiful! Be strong.

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It may seem lonely now, especially in a time where support and love from a significant other is what you want most. But don't forget your family and loved ones. They are truly the people who will surround you and love on you for the rest of your life and especially now. And soon enough you'll have a gorgeous baby who will be the light of your life and make everything seem wonderful and new. And don't count yourself out for a love life down the road. Think of this as a new beginning and dedicate yourself to what is truly best for you and your son. Good luck!

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First think of the name you will give him/her when he/she arrives. Go to stores, look through all baby clothes aisles, call family and friends to share the news,Why worry about other people's joys. You are having a baby, adding a new life to this world. Just thinking about it makes me reminisce.Congratulations

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User in Adams, NY
May 2, 2017

i am 17 years old and i just had a baby. the father is not in the picture so i know it is very hard to do it on your on but if you have faith in your self you should be okay.

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You just need to remember that not everyone is able to even have a baby. You won't be alone, you'll have your son. Once you see him, all that doubt will go away and a whole new world will be open for you.

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You have a miracle growing inside you....and you are NOT alone. Don't focus so much on the negative.... focus on all the positive! Smell the flowers, look for everything beautiful in the day, give yourself a fancy bath with candles...buy / pick yourself some flowers, spoil yourself! You are part of a miracle! =)

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In life, you have to endure the difficult challenges that occur. However, everyone has the skill to grow and be strong. Your child will be the light you have been searching for.

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The joy has never left you. Its just that your reaity hightened so now your mind is just focusing on making sure you are ok and prepared for your son's arrival. The joy is going to burst back at anytime now and you will love every minute of it.

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User in Union, KY
May 2, 2017

Maybe find a close relative, or a good friend and ask that person to help you make preparations. It can create great bonds between you and the people you love!

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Maybe there is an organized group around your area with women dealing with this same issue. Becoming close with anyone with the same struggle as you is important. This doesn't mean you can't become close with women who are pregnant who have a significant other. Their boyfriends/husbands aren't "involved" in the pregnancy experience anyway. Don't let the fact that "you are alone" ruin your wonderful experience. You are never alone! Even if you feel more comfortable just talking on an online forum, reach out and find people going through the same things. They will appreciate it just as much as you :)

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Connect with other single moms. Every mom I've ever known who had an unplanned baby and kept it said that they wouldn't change a thing, even though at the time it was really, really hard and they didn't know what things would be like.

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User in Evans, GA
May 2, 2017

Meet other moms due around the same time. Sites like BabyCenter can help you connect to women due at the same time. Lean on family and friends. Maybe hire a doula to be your birthing partner. You can do this! And remember that happy couples aren't always as happy as they seem.

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User in Atlanta, GA
May 20, 2015

I know exactly how you feel because I went through the exact same thing while I was pregnant with my son. But I had to realize that God was about to bless me tremendously with a healthy baby boy. I began to read to him, let him listen to music and shop for him. Shopping for him was the most fun! I would imagine how cute he would look in certain outfits. The bonding from reading and playing music is what actually touched my heart the most. Simply because he would respond to these things by moving around or pushing his feet out at the direct the music was coming from. God will never put more on you than you can bare. Remember that a beautiful blessing that you created is on the way. As soon as he gets here he will be your best friend! He will love you for who you are and will not try to change you. My life actually started when I had my two children. I have so much fun spending time with them and making them happy. Imagine all the fun places you guys will go to once he begins walking! You'll find the best love in him because he will love you unconditionally! I really hate you are not having the best pregnancy but it will all pay off and you'll forget this pain you are going through as soon as you see his beautiful face. Take care sweetheart and I hope you feel better!

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User in Burton, MI
May 2, 2017

Instead of seeing fun couples everytime you turn around, think about stuff that makes being single better for you! No arguements, no bosses, you get it all to yourself!

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Hello, you are not alone! Reach out to neighbors and your community, you will be surprised at the kind souls that will step up to help you now as well as with caring for your son when he is born. I know because I volunteer my time babysitting for single mothers. :) I truly do believe it does indeed take a village to raise a child properly. If you are in NY, please don't hesitate to reach out to me. Take care hun!

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My dear you dnt have to be acouple to be a good parent,parenting is a total commitment to that child ,showing him or her on conditional love that will bring out the best in that child.

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User in Devine, TX
May 2, 2017

All u need is faith.

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everyones situation is different, you have to remember that. But there are some positive things about being a single mother, like you get to make all the choices, you get to give them enough love for two parents. remember also that some children are praying for at least one parent to love them and they don't have that. You have the opportunity to make your sons life amazing and make him feel like a very loved little boy. And if you feel like you won't be able to handle it by yourself you can hire a nanny that with some luck if you hire the right fit for you can become like a part of the family.:)

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I have never been a mom, single or otherwise, but as I nanny, I am constantly amazed by the strength of a mother! And the more I see bad mothers out there who neglect their kids, the more I am grateful for moms like you who want to give their baby as much love as possible! It is really hard to feel lonely, but know that your baby is with you now & will be more obviously with you when he is born & he is going to love you so much! and you never know when that special someone might come into your life, so try to stay positive & ready for when that day comes. You are going to do great, sweetie! Also, I disagree with Cynthia. Sometimes it is not your choice to be single & I think that's a bad assumption to make.

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You are going to give birth to a tiny life who will look at you like you are their whole world. This tiny little boy will love you unconditionally and look up to you. Focus on that and I think you might be able to find a little joy in these months.

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1- you have to relax because thanks Good new life came to this word 2- you are not the only one who having a baby by you on 3- l am a example l have two and thank Gods they so proud me ,is hard but l did so you can't .4- be positive, lovely, end strong end everything else is going to be wonderful, God bless you and good luck . sincerely ;Belkis Espinal .

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