Moving and Kids

Moving is one of life's big stressors, and extra care and consideration needs to be taken when you're moving with children. Whether you're the one packing and labeling, or if you've hired help, consider these tips to help make your move easier:

Hire muscles

I firmly believe that once you have children (and all of their associated stuff) it's no longer appropriate to call your friends to help lift your boxes. Movers may seem expensive, but if you think about the speed/care tradeoff, professionals are well worth it. To save money, check rates with local moving companies vs. the major chains, and ask friends if they have had a good experience with any local movers. Often times you can find excellent small moving companies that are less expensive than and as good as the competition.

Arrange for childcare

Depending on your child's age, you may wish for them to see the moving process, or prefer them to be entertained off site. Either way, lining up childcare will be beneficial. When our daughter was a toddler, we decided to book our move on a day when she was home, so she could see the items being loaded into the truck, and then deposited in our new home. But we also hired a babysitter to take care of her once the move was underway, freeing us to focus on directing the move and unpacking her room at the new house. Extra supervision for the kids can also assure that nobody gets hurt during the move-with the boxes and people in and out of the house, another pair of eyes on the kids is a great idea.

Packing help #1

If you have room in your budget and are short on time, hire people to pack your boxes for you. Whether you hire professional packers or pack on your own, make sure you have plenty of boxes, packing tape, and markers on hand. For our last move we also bought fluorescent mailing labels and color-coded the boxes per room ("DR" written on pink labels = dining room, "LR" written on green labels = living room, etc.). This system made unloading and unpacking easier. I also recommend writing the general contents under the fluorescent label so it is easier to find your belongings.

Packing help #2

Consider a mama swap. For our last move, it turned out that one of our daughter's best friends was also moving, so we did a "packing and play date swap" where I took my friend's kids for a few hours so she and her husband could pack, and vice versa.

Engage your child in the process

One thing that parents tend to forget is that while they likely have been through many moves, their child has not. Assure your child that all toys and books will be moving, in addition to furniture, etc. Depending on the age of your child, engage him or her in the process--have your child help pack a box of toys. Our daughter loves writing letters so we actually had her help label boxes; it was a fun activity for her (she loved writing on the fluorescent labels!) and also allowed us to get some packing done alongside her.

Pack survival boxes

It's tempting toward the end of the packing process to just throw things into unlabeled boxes, but resist the urge and pack a couple of survival boxes, including your most used kitchen supplies (a frying pan, spatula, couple of plates, etc.) and your child's favorite toys or activities, plus clothing, bath essentials, sunscreen, etc. Move these boxes yourself, or label the boxes "SURVIVAL" and instruct the movers to place them in an immediate access space (e.g., kitchen counter) once you get to the new home. Your "SURVIVAL" box can really come in handy, at the end of the day, when you're just too pooped to go looking through boxes for your toothbrush and other essential items.

Hire cleaners

It's nice to move into a home that you know is clean. Depending on the size of your new home and the state of your packing, consider hiring professional cleaners. If the previous owners/tenants had pets and you have allergies, a professional cleaning service for vents and any rugs will be essential. Your move-out clean is another important to-do. Have your service do a thorough cleaning after you're moved out. Some cleaning services and housekeepers have special rates for move-in and move-out cleaning projects.

Confirm parties and transfer services

The week or two before your move, confirm all parties, such as professional movers, cleaners, locksmith (for re-keying locks), etc. Call to stop service on former utilities and start service at the new home. Fill out a mail forwarding request with the postal service. Change over magazine subscriptions. Send an email to your friends and colleagues about your new move.

Unpacking

The strategy on this end is similar to the packing; you can opt to hire people to unpack you, but given that you would have to be around to provide instructions anyway, I would suggest getting a sitter to engage your child while you unpack. Our daughter loves artwork and was happy to color or draw near us while we unpacked from our last move. It allowed us to chat with her and be engaged, while getting the house sorted. It also can be helpful to ask kids for help in unpacking, particularly in setting up the child's room. Ask where they would like to put their rocking chair, toys, etc. Giving them this control can help ease transition pangs.

Be flexible

Even if your moving logistics go well, your child may be distressed over the change. Be flexible and prepared for disturbed sleep, acting out, clinginess, etc. Continue to discuss moving with your child; offer reassurance that all of the important stuff is the same and has been moved, but that everything is simply in a new place. Read books about moving, such as The Berenstain Bears' Moving Day.

Consider a new home gift

Consider a new house gift for your child. It can be something small, like an inexpensive toy, book, or stuffed animal, or something fancier, depending on the circumstances. During our last move, our daughter was ready to transition to a big girl bike and we had been planning on getting her one anyway, so we decided that the bike would be her new house present. We talked about the bike beforehand, engaged her help in picking out the style of the bike and helmet, and then the bike was waiting for her in the new home when she arrived.

On the day of the move

Instruct your movers to load your child's room last so it can be unloaded first. This will allow you to get your child's bed and essentials set up while the movers continue to unload.

Final follow up

Once the dust has settled, I highly recommend sending letters if you were particularly happy or unhappy with any of the services you booked. And as forwarded mail comes in, change any addresses as necessary.

Christine Koh is a music and brain scientist who writes about child care for Care.com. she is the creator of BostonMamas.com.